“Verily! To God we belong & verily, to Him we shall return”
This statement is very powerful and when we truly understand it, it will help us to cope with our loss. It is not something we simply say but it is also an understanding that everything we are given (and this is a key point) whether it is our family, youth, beauty, health, career – everything belongs to God, it is a gift from God and it is something that does not belong to us.
So when God gifts us family, friends, jobs, health, beauty etc., we should appreciate that God out of His mercy He allowed us to enjoy these gifts for a while and when they returned to Him it is because they BELONGED to Him. God gave us these things for a short time and He took them back because they belong to Him, they don’t belong to us – they never did.
For example; if my friend lets me borrow his/her phone. I use this phone for a few months, make calls, text, downloading games etc. and then after a few months a point comes when my friend wants the phone back. It is not befitting for me to get angry or hurt when my friend asks me for the phone back because it was something that was borrowed and I always had to give it back to him/her.
When a loved one dies it is very easy to question or complain about the timing of the death. But we must understand that God is the controller of all events, He is the creator and taker of life. He manages all of our affairs causing everything to happen at the right time and right place. If God did not think you could handle this calamity at this stage of your life He would never have given it to you at this time. He knows this is the right time for you to be going through this.
Know that if we are patient, when we understand, recognise and apply “Innalilahi wa inna ilayhi rajioon” We have been promised by God that we will be rewarded with His blessings, His mercy and we will be from those who are the rightly guided – what could be better than this?
God will test our faith by taking the lives of close ones. The emotional pain and suffering during this time may be so intense that it can either strengthen our faith or break it. God tests us to see if we can overcome these feelings of shock, anger, denial, depression by turning to Him for comfort and support during these difficult times.
Place your trust and hope in Him. Turn to God because where else can you go? Who else can you turn to? Who gave you this hardship/test? Who understands your deepest thoughts? Who understands the language of pain in your heart before it is even manifested as words on your lips? God does. And it is only Him that can help/guide you through this pain. If you are touched with a hardship no one can remove it but God; so come close to God and heal your heart through prayer and patience.
See nothing in this life lasts. Everything passes away and that can cause us pain. Whether this is in the form of losing a person, a job, an important object etc. but understand this – that just as the good times didn’t last, the bad times will not last either. They will go away, the pain will get less. Whether it is pleasure or pain – it will come to an end. But what is important and what remains is how we dealt with the hardship when it came to us…